Being the Bigger Person

Now that I have been working for a year, and been through some rough times times feel like I have finally become a successful person and now I am able to provide for my daughter. But like always I just can never have everything running smoothly. I want to be able to be independent and handle my money and handle my stuff, but it's seem that he always wants to be the boss. I do respect him were he feels like the man of the family but I would like to run things myself. I would like to be able to search the web or be able to read stuff without being judged I would like to have some me time. I would like to have friends to talk to but i always seem to find the wrong type of friends were he thinks of me the worst. I want him stop considering as a little girl that he can take away my phone take all the money and manage how much i spend but he in the other can save money and something for his car that's 300 dollars. I try to give him everything he wants i just can never have him happy. Now that i have this job i love that can my own money but i still the same i still feel stuck like i have commitment to give it to him. Don't get me wrong i do love him but sometimes i feel like fish that can swim or a bird that is not allowed to fly. The worst part is when i try to say something things get worst and says that he's the boss and that I'm just a little girl its hard when u have with the same person since u were15 because they always think ur same person they but reality u have changed and grown.

Life could be full of surprises.

I haven't wrote in a long time, I been busy and not feeling well. Yeasterday I went to an interfiew and I got the job "yay!!!", but won't start until feb so I guess bills are gunna have to wait. Yeaterday I started following a blog of a young butterfly. She is a baby that is 2 months younger than my baby. She fighting for her life, she has a tumor in her brain. She had surgery yeasterday and is doing well. When I read her blog I cried and was so thankfull that my baby was healthy. Yeasterday I also came into realization that all this time I kept complaning about how I wanted to better my life, and their others in situations that are more difficult. I kinda felt selfish. I will be more thankfull for my babys and my health. I also wanted to tell everyone to keep scarlett grace in their prayers. She needs us even though she is doing well she need all we can give.

New At This

This is my second day blogging i like it it makes me be open and be a little more relief about life. Today woke up with the flu, and not feeling very well. I am hoping i dont get my little one sick or im gunna be all week in the ER. I have been looking for a job but still no luck. I am also worried because my boyfriend was suppose To start work today but they ended up sending him home, I guess we r gunna have to keep living off unemployment. Today is also a bad day everyone started school and I'm still here at home trying to make ends meet and be able go back to school. I thought I was going to be a great year but it started all wrong. But I keep my head up high it only the beginning.

new year

this years resolution is one of the hardest. this year im starting as a mom and unemployed and trying to go back to college. i want to be able to find a job and give daughter what she wats she need and wants. i also hope to  keep my relationship with my boyfriend and be a family.